Tag Archives: Humor
“Fact: The grilled cheese sandwich was invented by the J. Walter Thompson advertising agency, in 1936.” Louis Witting has some other surprising news for you, too.
“Existentialism, like mononucleosis, is a wasting disease that afflicts college students across America almost as soon as they unpack their laptops and iPod docking stations.” Con Chapman has the cure.
“The vile blob is shaped exactly like the can. The way the ridges are still indented into the side of the quivering mass—it makes me shudder.” Nick Honeywell has your Thanksgiving FAQs.
“All this First World-Third World sniping overlooks the problems of the long-neglected Second World, which most people couldn’t find on a map.” Con Chapman pinpoints it for you.
“I was being observed through the dining room window by Kathy and Alma, who were laughing uncontrollably at the dissonant sight of a grown and graying man in a Mickey Mouse T-shirt given over completely to a ponderous, pulsating rage.” The madness of Jerry DeNuccio.
“As soon as the sun starts hanging low in the sky, so many moods to follow. People who write textbooks call it ‘Seasonal Affective Disorder.’ I call it ‘just another reason winter sucks.’” Never fear: Sarah Murrell has the cure.
“Now, I have five bits of criteria that have to be checked off before I go to the theater and spend twelve bucks to watch a film.” Will Mike Epifani make it to the movies this week?
“What I’d like to know is how is it that you never really see all that many pumpkins growing, then suddenly it’s October and there are thousands of them stacked up everywhere you turn.” And other things Ann Henry-Callahan thinks about the fall.
“Some people would claim that those three unknown drivers are litterers desecrating our beautiful highways and byways; I would argue they are artists and the cigarette stub is their paint brush—a Kolinsky red sable brush if you will—and the open road is their canvas.” M. Kelly Peach sees the beautiful potential in cigarette litter.
“Gene Wilder totally nailed the Willy Wonka thing. I mean, the epileptic-mongoose-in-a-hurricane hairstyle, the secret-loaded twinkle in the eye, the occasional tangent of possible psychosis with just a hint of Santa Claus.” And other thoughts Ann Henry-Callahan had in the shower.