"Bipartisan? Listen: I don't go in for any of those back-door shenanigans."
In Wednesday’s Indianapolis Star, Matthew Tully reported on a question U.S. Senate nominee Richard Mourdock answered last spring. According to Tully, “The Republican Senate nominee told several reporters and editors that day that if he were a member of the Senate next year but in the minority, his top goal would be to travel the nation campaigning for fellow conservative candidates.” Tully added, “The answer was as petty as it was depressingly political and partisan. And it underscored Mourdock’s deep misunderstanding of the responsibilities and power every senator has — even those in the minority.”
Now Punchnel’s has obtained a document enumerating the rest of Mourdock’s ”Top 10 Priorities When I Get To The Senate.” The list is reproduced in its entirety below.
Richard Mourdock–Top 10 Senate Priorities
1. Travel nation campaigning for fellow conservative candidates.
2. Score kick-ass seats to December 3 Redskins-Giants game. (Meet Eli?)
3. Use franking privileges to send Crooked Creek Golf Club newsletter. (Shows fiscal responsibility, promotes education [golf-related], gives Post Office something to do.)
4. Eat a different Steak ‘n Shake Steak Shooter in every state capital (Steak ‘n Shake states only.)
5. Honorary doctorate from Liberty University. (Find out what Glenn Beck got.)
6. Junkets!
7. Two words: underpants.
8. Get Rush Limbaugh’s autograph. (Ask to Giants game, maybe.)
9. Find out where the government prints money. Hang out around the Dumpster. (Secret Service–problem or opportunity?)
10. Get reelected.
Mourdock allegedly told reporters that if he is elected and the Republicans gain a majority in the Senate, his goal will be to “roast Democrat senators on a spit and feed them to my Dark Lord.” He mentioned no other priorities.
